Two babies were born on the same day at the same hospital. They lay there and looked at each other. Their families came and took them away. Eighty years later, by a bizarre coincidence, they lay in the same hospital, on their deathbeds, next to each other. One of them looked at the other and said, 'So. What did you think?'

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I can remember the first time I had to go to sleep.
Mom said, 'Steven, time to go to sleep.'
I said, 'But I don't know how.'
She said, 'It's real easy. Just go down to the end of tired and hang a left.'
So I went down to the end of tired, and just out of curiosity I hung a right.
My mother was there, and she said 'I thought I told you to go to sleep.'

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